Can't talk Long...

Well I am off to bed, tomorrow we are headed into work early and then it's more chaos for the weekend, but definitely GOOD chaos...

Lots of Love to everyone. It may be Saturday evening before I get the chance to post again...

I will leave you with some pictures of the beach that my sister-n-law took and posted to her blog. I figured since most people don't have access to her blog, I would let you enjoy them on mine. Thanks for letting me share them Candace: You are an amazing Photographer!

Annoying Noises: Purely meant for HUMOR (by: Mrs. INSANE)

I woke up this morning, dragged myself downstairs to hop into the shower and I hear this LOUD annoying beeping sound. It sounded like a smoke detector beeping, only louder, longer, and definitely more annoying! I "yell" to Nick because he is in the other room to look into that horrendous noise while I get in the shower. A little while later he comes into the bathroom and says that it's one of the smoke detectors beeping cause the batteries dead, but he wasn't sure exactly which one.

I "yelled" at him again, this time really "yelling" because it's BAD ENOUGH to wake up to the sound of an alarm clock, but that noise certainly was making me GROUCHY real quick! I asked him to PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take the battery out. "Well, honey..." he says I did but they are still all beeping! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! What?? You mean I have to listen to that annoying beep all freaking morning.

I think we left for work quicker this morning than we ever have. So, I was going to pick up some batteries on the way home, but then I forgot that Nick had to go to grandpa's to mow, Kaylynn is in town, and Russell and mom were supposed to bring the picnic table over to the house for Saturday. So, Nick dropped me off at mom's and then went to mow and I rode over with Russell and Kaylynn to my house. ONE PROBLEM WITH THAT: Nick had the car, Nick had the available method of money, and I HAD NO STINKING BATTERIES...

FINALLY... a few hours later of getting ready to go INSANE Nick arrives home with the batteries. He changes all of them because we couldn't figure out which one was beeping. GUESS WHAT?? THERE IS STILL A BEEP! So we spent the LAST hour searching and listening for this stupid, annoying, insane, LOUD beeping noise that has officially given me the headache from you know where. WOW! and GUESS WHAT?? Nick finally discovered what it was: THE STINKING CARBON MONOXIDE DETECTOR which was crammed into a drawer cause I had to quick get ready for the party last Saturday and it didn't yet have a home! OMG! Finally... peace and quiet....

GUESS AGAIN?? NOW THE SMOKE DETECTOR is beeping profusely and we can't figure out WHY!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP!

Needless to say.... if one more person asks me for a 70 count notebook.... my head is going to explode! oh yeah, and P.S. the CARBON DETECTOR takes double AA batteries and I HAD a pack of them sitting on my desk ALL ALONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A Different Approach

Okay, I started writing several times, and then erased everything I wrote several more times. I think I am battling with the fact that if I let you into my life, if I share my current feelings and thoughts, then I might just come across as someone who complains a lot, someone who is negative... and I just DON'T want to be that person. So I decided not to write at all, and then I decided to write to tell you why I wasn't going to say anything at all.... and then I decided to just take a different approach. I went online, searched for an inspiring story to lift my spirits and share with you and this is what I came up with: a message that I REALLY needed to hear and hopefully a message that will help you along the way as well...

From The Desk of GOD
-- Author Unknown
(taken from http://www.inspire21.com/site/stories.html)

Effective Immediately:

Please be aware that there are changes you need to make in your life. These changes need to be completed in order that I may fulfill my promises to you to grant you peace, joy and happiness in this life. I apologize for any inconvenience, but after all that I am doing, this seems very little to ask of you. I know, I already gave you the 10 Commandments. Keep them. But follow these guidelines as well...

1. QUIT WORRYING

Life has dealt you a blow and all you do is sit and worry. Have you forgotten that I am here to take all your burdens and carry them for you? Or do you just enjoy fretting over every little thing that comes your way?

2. PUT IT ON THE LIST

Something needs done or taken care of. Put it on the list. No, not YOUR list. Put it on MY to-do-list. Let ME be the one to take care of the problem. I can't help you until you turn it over to me. And, although my to-do-list is long, I am, after all, God. I can take care of anything you put into my hands. In fact, if the truth were ever really known, I take care of a lot of things for you that you never even realize.

3. TRUST ME

Once you've given your burdens to me, quit trying to take them back. Trust in me. Have the faith that I will take care of all your needs, your problems and your trials. Problems with the kids? Put them on my list. Problem with finances? Put it on my list. Problems with your emotional roller coaster? For my sake, put it on my list. I want to help you. All you have to do is ask.

4. LEAVE IT ALONE

Don't wake up one morning and say, "Well, I'm feeling much stronger now, I think I can handle it from here." Why do you think you are feeling stronger now? It's simple. You gave me your burdens and I'm taking care of them. I also renew your strength and cover you in my peace. Don't you know that if I give you these problems back, you will be right back where you started? Leave them with me and forget about them. Just let me do my job.

5. TALK TO ME

I want you to forget a lot of things. Forget what was making you crazy. Forget the worry and the fretting because you know I'm in control. But there's one thing I pray you never forget. Please don't forget to talk to me - OFTEN! I love you. I want to hear your voice. I want you to include me in on the things going on in your life. I want to hear you talk about your friends and family. Prayer is simply you having a conversation with me. I want to be your dearest friend.

6. HAVE FAITH

I see a lot of things from up here that you can't see from where you are. Have faith in me that I know what I'm doing. Trust me, you wouldn't want the view from my eyes. I will continue to care for you, watch over you, and meet your needs. You only have to trust me. Although I have a much bigger task than you, it seems as if you have so much trouble just doing your simple part. How hard can trust be?

7. SHARE

You were taught to share when you were only two years old. When did you forget? That rule still applies. Share with those who are less fortunate than you. Share your joy with those who need encouragement. Share your laughter with those who haven't heard any in such a long time. Share your tears with those who have forgotten how to cry. Share your faith with those who have none.

8. BE PATIENT

I managed to fix it so in just one lifetime you could have so many diverse experiences. You grow from a child to an adult, have children, change jobs many times, learn many trades, travel to so many places, meet thousands of people, and experience so much. How can you be so impatient then when it takes me a little longer than you expect to handle something on my to-do-list? Trust in my timing, for my timing is perfect. Just because I created the entire universe in only six days, everyone thinks I should always rush, rush, rush.

9. BE KIND

Be kind to others, for I love them just as much as I love you. They may not dress like you, or talk like you, or live the same way you do, but I still love you all. Please try to get along, for my sake. I created each of you different in some way. It would be too boring if you were all identical. Please know I love each of your differences.

10. LOVE YOURSELF

As much as I love you, how can you not love yourself? You were created by me for one reason only - to be loved, and to love in return. I am a God of Love. Love me. Love your neighbors. But also love yourself. It makes my heart ache when I see you so angry with yourself when things go wrong. You are very precious to me. Don't ever forget that!

With all my heart, I love you,
GOD

To Blog...

or NOT to blog...

My mind has a million things that it is feeling, but my fingers aren't typing...
so I guess thats my answer.

Someone Understands

I have been trying to write a poem about Gastroparesis for a while now, but just can't find the words to describe how I feel and what I am going through. As I was looking at the new members on my "Gastroparesis Sucks" my space group, I came across a poem posted that just made me break down and cry because it's MY LIFE in a nutshell. I decided to post that poem for all of you in hopes that it will help you understand what I battle with on a daily basis.

Obviously I have to give credit where credit is due. The poem is by Mary Hastings and was found on Lauradorable's my space page.

WHEN YOU SEE ME

by Mary Hastings

written May 2003

When you see me on a "good day"

I may look as if nothing's wrong,

But I, myself, am very aware

That the energy won't last long.

You may think that I am lazy,

Or I just don't like to try,

Or maybe I am just depressed,

When sometimes you see me cry.

You may not understand me,

It's not easy to explain,

The struggles that I so often endure,

As I live each day in pain.

People may offer their opinions,

Thinking that I just need some advice,

Yet they don't really comprehend,

Although they are trying to be nice.

What for some may be so easy,

Is almost impossible to me,

But because I may look healthy,

Many around me fail to see.

Perhaps it seems that I'm sloppy,

If I would only take more pride,

It's sad that many don't stop to see,

The person who is inside.

Planning things is so hard to do,

With each day uncertain fate,

The best that I can do is try,

And oftentimes I have to wait.

Life can be so stressful,

Even when you have your health,

Many people cannot even imagine,

Giving up their dreams and wealth.

While some people may worry,

How to fit everything into each day,

Others of us must struggle,

To even find a way.

So often misunderstood,

Some say that is must be "in my head,"

Yet there are days that it takes all I have

To even get out of bed.

You'd think that if one is weary,

Then why not just take a nap,

But the fatigue at times is so severe,

That nothing seems to help.

If exercise were the answer,

I would just move into a gym,

But intolerance and unbearable pain

Makes it difficult to stay trim.

That's alright just take a pill--

Medications can always do some good,

However, sometimes the effects are far worse,

Oh, but how wonderful it would be if I could!

Living each day fighting defeat,

Knowing that you can't give up and quit,

Even though it gets hard to do,

Find ways of accepting it.

I guess it would be a better thing,

If there were a little more support,

Everyone longs for acceptance and love,

As they keep their life in sort.

If I could make the world aware,

Help them to see things in a new light,

Be careful on what they base their view,

That they may receive a new insight.

Then maybe when someone else comes along,

Who is going through something unknown,

They may not feel so hopeless and scared,

And will know that they're not alone.

Whether it be a terminal thing,

Or something chronic with no known cure,

There are many processes that will be faced

In this we can rest assured.

The grieving over loss is hard,

Whatever the loss may be.

What may be just a bump for you,

Could seem like a mountain to me.

Everyone responds so differently,

We all have our own ways to cope,

But the one thing that we must never do,

Is believe that there's no hope.

For I faithfully trust in God above,

And no matter what the future may bring,

I know that He is holding my hand,

And He's in control of EVERYTHING.

Housewarming Party

I am hoping that I can be back a little more consistently now that my stress level has somewhat decreased, although I am still very worried about my great Uncle Joe. It looks like they have temporarily suspended the search; however, the family is still looking. I have not heard any updates from Mary Ruth or Russell yet, but I will continue to keep you posted. I appreciate all of the prayers from my faithful readers!

We had our first housewarming party today and I think it went really well despite the rain and having to make do inside. We had a small turn out, which actually was nice in a way because we had more time to visit with family. Here are some pictures.

For those of you who don't know, we had a "dip" party. We had pizza dip, taco dip. spinach dip, fruit dip, white cheddar jalepeno dip, hummus dip, salsa, and french onion dip. We ended up just setting up some tables in the porch and eating in there rather than outside. It sure has been a rainy summer!

Here are the guests that came to our party:

P.S. The secret identity of callalily has been revealed (I CAN SLEEP AGAIN....LOL) however, for those of you still trying to figure out who SHE is, I will let you keep guessing....

Thanks to everyone who took the time to come see our house and spend some time with us today. We appreciate everyone's love and support very much.

P.P.S. To all my sisters: I posted to our private site

Behind the Scenes

This week has been kicking my butt, although I feel guilty in a way for being "stressed" about some of the things that have taken up my mind this week when there are others out there going through so much more than I am currently am.

I am really worried about my great Uncle Joe, who is still currently missing, and really wish that I could be there with everyone searching for him. I am glad that Russell, Mary Ruth, and my dad were able to make the trip to help search for him. I can honestly say, as most of you know, that I don't really "know" my dad's side of the family; however, I care very much. Thanks to everyone who has taken the time to pray. Please keep the prayers coming.

Tomorrow is our first housewarming party and we are no where even near where I would like our house to be. It's going to be a long night and after the horrible week I have had I wish that I could just go to bed. I just want the stress to end, the drama to end, and to forget this week ever existed.

I think that I won't bother catching you up on this week as it's not one I care to talk about, think about, or ever re-live. I will tell you though something GOOD that came out of this week: Thursday Russell surprised us and brought my girls (Josie and Autumn) to see us on our lunch break. It was a well needed surprise and I can always count on my niece bringing a smile to my face. She has teeth by the way! I am looking forward to seeing them again next weekend at our second housewarming party.

P.S. For those of you I owe e-mails to and private comment responses to, you will get them as soon as I make it through the party tomorrow.